Originally Posted by DesertFoxAZ

Teatreeoil007,

Yeah, my parents are weird. I am about the most anti-drug person you'll ever meet yet my mom was always concerned that I was doing drugs or the devil (since I listed to hard rock music...). She used to go through my trash and journals thinking I was up to something but there was no reason for them to ever think that. I guess they didn't trust my friends. My family doesn't know my friend even exists and it's going to stay that way.

Her ex claimed he read some of my emails but didn't read others. His reasoning was that he wanted to censor what I was saying because he thought she might get upset at some of the things I said. I know she was extremely paranoid that he was doing that, as well as going through her text messages. She has very little privacy and I can understand why, but I think he went a little too far at times. But whatever, it's a moot point now.

I believe my friend does think all she has are her looks, but there's so much more there and I hope she realizes that. There are a lot of other reasons I was so drawn to her and was willing to do so much to try to help her. I believed she was a soul-mate.

I don't regret getting close to my friend. While things got really bad, there were still a lot of good times and I'll always cherish them. She'll always mean something to me, even if my feelings toward her are not particularly favorable right now. I wish her luck and continue to pray for her.

Anyway, I really appreciate all the feedback I've gotten regarding this. It has been very therapeutic discussing this. Believe it or not, this was the condensed version. There's a lot more even more crazy stuff that I didn't mention but I'd still like to keep some things private, even if it seems silly considering what I have shared. I tried discussing this matter in another forum and got some really harsh criticism so to finally hear from people who understand has been a blessing.

I'll do my best to continue to heal. I know it will take time. Thank you.