Congrats Doug on getting this far through the steps. I know in my own experience getting to the point you are at now was in some ways a relief, yet the prospect of actually starting the amends process did cause me a bit of anxiety. After all, I was about to put myself "out there" with no control of how others would react to my amends.
I found that this was a critical juncture in my recovery, and probably the most difficult for me. This is where I had to remind myself that I was willing to go to any lengths to stay sober, and I guess this is what "any lengths" looks like (making amends)
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When I made my list of amends I grouped them into ones I would do now, ones I would do later, ones I was on the fence about doing, and finally ones I couldn't see myself ever doing. This made getting started easier as the amends in my now group were to people I knew would accept my amends and were genuinely glad I was sober. It turns out that by the time I finished the now list I had become willing to move on to the next group. By the time I had made amends to the first few people on the later list the 9th and 10th step promises all started to come true for me.
If you're feeling a little uneasy just read the 9th and10th step promises...they have all come true for me and I am confident that they will come true for you too if you keep moving forward!
