Ap052183

It's been nearly 2 years since my breakup and I've learned a ton about myself but I'm hopelessly depressed. I still miss my ex terribly despite him treating me not so great at times. I've moved on to a new relationship...and I've dated many great guys...and every single time I end up isolating, sad, and disconnected. I push away and end up feeling resentment towards them. My friendships have suffered and I feel incredibly alone. I thought leaving would bring amazing changes in my life, and as hard as this is to admit I'm no happier than when I was with him. I'm a nurse so I understand this is most likely depression. I know that it can get better. I've been in therapy for two years and I've decided to see a psychiatrist. I don't know who I am anymore. I look at old pictures and see this happy, energetic person with a bright future and that person is gone. I need to get back there. I still obsess about my relationship daily. I feel like I've blamed my ex for these feelings for a long time, and the reality is that he had little to do with it. I relied on him for my happiness too much and I've had to face the reality it wasn't his responsibility. Has anyone been here? Has anyone had success with medication? Not asking for medical advice but more so success stories.