Originally Posted by
atalose 
Once it finally sunk in that I needed to stop trying to control that outcome and just be there to wipe my kid’s tears away and support them while they worked through their emotions of disappointment, hurt, anger, etc, all of those conversations I was planning to have in my head stopped and my anxiety pretty much went away.
It’s not easy, we never want to see our children hurt but life isn’t always fair and they need to learn that.
I agree - I found it far more productive feeling to focus on helping DD build her own tools & that all I was concerned about was HER perspective & anxiety about what was happening. That was something I could DO something about, you know? I also became painfully aware of how much I wouldn't be able to protect her from in life all around - friends, enemies, peer pressure, etc.
If it were me, I wouldn't speak with my ex at all - a simple, "sorry, no pics!" is sufficient & reasonable. You aren't obligated to engage with him & you don't owe him any explanations beyond simple answers to straight-forward questions.
((((Hugs))))) Mama, it's never easy but it IS manageable!