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Old 02-20-2017, 02:22 AM
  # 14 (permalink)  
Gottalife
12 Step Recovered Alcoholic
 
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Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 6,613
Originally Posted by Noel2016 View Post
Thanks for all the good advice. I do have to be aware of all the triggers. It seems like my mind is trying to trick me into drinking because everything seems to be a trigger right now. I thought I was on track in a completely different mindset, and doing positive things for myself but it felt like it was wearing me down secretly and it only took a moment of weakness and the old mindset takes over, and now its like the sober concept is so far from my thoughts. if that makes any sense. I will keep fighting. and take it one day at a time.
Everything was a trigger, and when there were no triggers, that was a trigger too. Can't win with this trigger thing.

The moment of weakness makes perfect sense to me. It is classic alcoholism as I experienced it and as described in AAs big book. "Once more: The alcoholic at certain times has no effective mental defense against the first drink. Except in a few rare cases, neither he nor any other human being can provide such a defense. His defense must come from a Higher Power."

They labour this point quite a bit. Of course we all like to think we are one of the rare cases to whom this does not apply, but experience showed me otherwise.
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