I love the uhaul and wedding plans analogy! I appreciate the humor and while thankfully knew enough not to get married when I sensed the relationships were on shaky ground, I certainly allowed things to progress from 0 to 60mph. I definitely seem to find ways to "move them in" very quickly. And always seem to find the ones eager to do so as well.
So yeah, no defensiveness necessary at all, I agree with what is being said for sure. I think I just want to learn how to approach relationships in the proper way, not in the way I have been.
Other than this issue, I am a well balanced person. Healthy, career-minded, decent enough looking, financially stable, outgoing, personable, wonderful system of friends and family. I'm the person that's always receiveds the "you're the whole package!" comments often and the "you're such a great catch!" stuff (and I don't think they're even saying it out of pity, at least not all the time!)
So my thoughts when relationships happened fast and people latched were always - "Of course they are! You're awesome and they just found you and you're the best person they've ever met!" Etc etc. So it is a self-esteem boost I suppose but also deep down I definitely feel like a GOOD person. I feel successful in basically all things, except love.
So knowing that I am a decent, loving, stable, successful person in most other ways, I just need to determine the way to bring that stability and mindfulness into relationships. I wish I'd have learned this skill years ago but they don't seem to teach it in books or in school (or at least, not back then -- with the internet you can probably learn everything now).
Hopefully it's not too late for me to learn the right way to move forward.