Good for you for coming back today! You said you have an all or nothing personality, why not throw it all into sobriety? I tried and failed many times, it wasn't until I made the decision that I would never drink again that the anxiety of my addiction began to lift. I'm only 19 days in, but I feel really good.
One thing that helped me tremendously was reading the thread "Excerpts from Under The Influence" It helped me understand why my willpower wasn't enough to control my addiction. Once I took a drink if there was more available I was going to drink it. At one point I was drinking almost a fifth of vodka a night. Here is a link:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...influence.html
It sounds like you have a good head on your shoulders and you are so young, you've got this!