Gee you guys....stop it. Someone please pass me your sleeve.
((((((Chy))))))) hugs back sis.....yep us Catholics eh? I finally got hit by one of those lightening bolts.
(((((((Laura * Kim)))))))) thanks, happy to call you all my friend too, there is HOPE, if I can do this anyone can.
(((((Kath))))) yep some two years this has been for a lot of us. Proud, nope not feeling proud at all, the truth be told I feel sick about it all. I've sat here a few times and tried to wrap my brain around what's happened, I feel like I've walked out of a nightmare, a nightmare that was going to KILL me, one way or another. We like to use humor don't we, it covers a lot of pain up, doesn't it?
Feel like that girl on the movie Jaws, in a sharks mouth being tossed every which way for a long time, the more time went by the harder it would shake me.....one day I left a real bad taste in it's mouth and it finally tossed me, tossed me on the beach, that's where I'm sitting today, still sorta dazed wondering what happened, learning how to live life sober now, I want to cry when I think of all the wasted years, and for what, WE do this to kill ourselves, it certainly doesn't make any sense does it?
You know sometimes I think back knowing full well I had a problem, tried telling people here, but they wouldn't listen. I think back to when I turned 40, close to 10 years ago, oh wow...my neighbour came over that night, I hadn't drank for two months, yep was doing it on my own, anyway she had some wine coolers, she wanted me to have some with her, she's not a big drinker...she didn't know I had a problem with it (something we don't brag about)....anyway I told her no thanks, I didn't want any......but she persisted, have just ONE, you know I tried to fight it off, she wouldn't back down, so finally I said ok I'll have ONE....needless to say I don't have to say what happened after that ONE.
Funny we know we are sick with this, and why on earth we let others make us think different that's a mystery. Not today for me, no way, I've finally opened up my eyes, I've talked openly to my neighbour about it, she's sorta in denial, oh you don't have a drinking problem, you just need to sort things out, that's all that's wrong...ooooooooo kkkkk then...lol. Yep not listening to anyone where I live anymore..some are ok with it, like my sister, I've denied it with her, she's said NOOOOOO you are not ok, you drink to much, you have a problem. Thanks my ((((((sis)))))).
Please take care of yourselves, today I don't ever want to go back to that kind of life, it's not living.....and I pray this helps ONE person today.
Lots of love....justme....Denise