I also still get triggers, usually as I am about to go to sleep stuff pops into my mind and I start feeling panicky and tearful. . It's a horrible feeling. I have a great boyfriend now. He's 6.4 and build like an outhouse but I feel safe with him even when we argue. I know he'd never abuse me. I never felt safe with my tiny, skinny ex and have flash backs to his abuse on many occasions. Like you I can't always figure out why I am upset at first. ((huge hugs))