Of course, no one has to go to meetings. A lot of people find them helpful, some find them necessary.. but obviously, the people who say they couldn't have stayed sober without going to AA meetings are people who, well, went to AA meetings AND stayed sober. Not all AAs stay sober, not all sober people are in AA.
I have 18 weeks and I haven't done any meetings this time around, but I did them in the past. I did not find anything but triggers in the rooms. Seeing my father in one of those rooms certainly would be a major.... well, maybe not a trigger at this point in time, but it's certainly not something I would want to experience. Unpleasant is a severe understatement. So I get you. I had the alcoholic and abuse parent(s), too, and it is not blaming them to point out that it's why we ended up alcoholics.. it's just a fact, and it sort of helps to understand the "why".