I found it was easier for me to let go of the resentment and anger when I let go of the entire situation with my alcoholic mom and just focused on myself. When I was still trying to control outcomes, trying to control what people (including my mom) thought of me and my decisions, hanging on to what "should be", I could not even pretend forgiveness. Now my prayer every day is for my HP to lead me and to keep the focus on me and my actions, etc. I feel so much freer and peaceful than I have in a long time.