Originally Posted by
hellrzr 
ByHisLove, you really need to attend some Al-Anon meetings. You will get lots of help there.
Seems clear to me that your husband knows that AA works but simply doesn't want to stop drinking. Why would he? He doesn't seem to have any negative consequences from drinking. If I hadn't started to suffer consequences I wouldn't have stopped either. He knows the solution that works and will work again if he takes the action to follow the steps and get back into AA.
Not to be too blunt or too rude, but any thing he tells you is just an excuse and he's blowing smoke up your ass, as they say. He knows AA works and he simply doesn't want to work the program and wants to keep drinking. Attend some Al-Anon and things will become more clear to you. Good luck.
Thanks for your response. I do understand that he's blowing smoke up my ass...I'm an alcoholic and addict myself. While he was going to AA he was reading the bible for several hours a night and that's what he says was keeping him sober. I don't think he actually even working the program, he was going mostly to make his mom happy because she had just found out he had been hiding his alcoholism from her for several years. (this was all before I met him)
I know these are still all excuses, but I can't make him do something he doesn't want to do of course, so I'm trying to encourage him in other ways.
I shared AVRT with him and surprisingly he says it's actually being helpful for him. He finally made it past the dreaded 3 day mark (his normal cycle is to drink every third day). I really like AVRT and as a Christian I think it fits in with my views quite easily.
He's also using a friend of his from church for daily accountability which is something he did on a 6 month streak a while back and it really helped. He is commiting to stay sober at least and to accept some kind of help, unlike before where he was just trying to act like it wasn't that big of a deal because he wanted to Keep drinking.
I still plan on going to Al-Anon and I'm working on it in counseling each week. I'm thankful that he's at least talking openly with me about it now and I'm hopeful for his recovery.