Thread: Today's plan
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Old 12-20-2016, 04:07 AM
  # 20 (permalink)  
aasharon90
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Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Baton Rouge, La.
Posts: 15,201
You are in a good safe place today with
good care for you before returning home.

When will you be released?

It was August 1990 when I was taken to
the hospital after running the road hitting
a 2 ft cut out in the road thru some road
construction and hitting a concrete culvert
sitting on top the ground at 2 am returning
home less than a mile from a local club of
listening to music, drinking with folks like
me while my little family, husband and 2
little ones slept in their beds.

I stayed there for 10 days pretty messed
up with them removing my punctured
spleen so I wouldn't bleed to death along
with numerous broken bones, many broken
ribs and fluid in my lungs, contusions etc.

After returned home vowing I wouldn't
drink again, I took my meds for accident
as prescribed till I didn't need them any
longer. Come August 1990, I was cured
so I thought and yet that voice, temptation
was calling once again and there I was
picking up exactly where I left off my drinking
in Feb and off to the club I went.

Same place, doing the same thing, returning
home the same time, making it safe this time
and this time another argument and with a
dare to end my misery and life, I took a
hand full of pills left over from my accident
and off to bed to sleep forever without ever
thinking about the consequences that lyed
ahead of me or my family, my babies.

Kids couldn't wake me the next morning
until I heard a faint bell ringing next to me
which was my mother in law looking for
me and the kids on their last day of vacation
bible school.


She screamed at me to get up and as I slurred
my words and in a fog and with grogginess, I
got up and went to throw up all I could that
was in my system and pull myself together.

By that time family was alerted and before I
knew it my spouse was trying to haul me to
the car to take me to the hospital to get my
stomach pumped. With every ounce of strength
to ward him off, he released his grip as I said I
was fine.

A little time passed and in came the authorities
to escort me to their car to be driven to a hospital.
As I passed my spouse and father in law, with daggers
in my eyes and anger in my voice, I told them I hated
both of them and off walked to the back seat of
the police car driving off feeling like a criminal
when I wouldn't hurt a fly. So full of anger and
resentments for what my family did to me.

I spent that first night in the crazy ward walking
softely amongst many sick folks watching them
hug the walls, mumbling, shuffling, just so sad
to see thinking surely I wasn't that far gone like
them.

Come the next day I passed all their test and
was sent up stairs to another part of the hospital
where those with alcohol and drug addiction
were staying and would begin my journey in
recovery learning about my addiction and its
affects on me and those around me.

I spent 28 days my choice after 2 weeks as
they wanted to send me to a halfway house
further away from my babies for 6 weeks, so
I pleaded to remain where I was for those 28
day doing whatever I needed to do and I did
with a 6 week outpatient attached which I also
completed along with many many meetings
sitting, following thru, suiting up, showing up.

It took awhile before I began to understand
the program of recovery in AA as I opened
my heart, mind and soul with willingness
and some honesty. Complete honesty would
eventually come much later down the road
which eventually opened up a new door
for me to really enjoy the blessings and
gifts offered to us by living and incorporating
the tools and knowledge of this recovery
program taught to me.

For a many one days sober at a time I never
wavered in wanting to return to the insanity
of drinking, no matter what life was throwing
my way. No, life isn't always easy or fair but
in realizing and acceptance I have learned how
to live life on lifes terms.

Some 26 yrs sober down the road, I continue
on my recovery journey passing what has been
taught to me to others still struggling with
addiction thru my own experiences, strengths
and hopes of what my life was and is like before,
during and after alcohol.

Today, I remain passionate and responsible
for my own recovery and in learning even
after all these yrs, alcohol and drugs is still
kicking butt and robbing us of many good
souls out there in the world everyday.

As you embark on your own journey in
life and recovery that you too will become
just as passionate and responsible for your
own recovery as countless other members
have and to know you never have to return
to the insanity that comes with addiction.

Be honest with your physicians or your doctor
about your addiction and recovery ahead of
you. For me, if I didn't and still don't tell my
own doctors truthfully and without a doubt
about my own addiction and recovery, they
will prescribe me what they think they need
to give me never mind that it is narcotic or
habit forming, keeping me just as sick as I was
when drinking.

They are just doctors doing their jobs
and yet they are the ones that keep
many folks sick, stinging them along,
abusing their own powers.

For me, they will not use me and I will
be the one to make sure that they don't
give me meds that will interfere or mess
with my own recovery that ive worked
so hard for and achieve.

I stand firm and unashamed of my disease
and recovery because I'm here on Earth
for a reason and purpose to live and help
others with the awareness of addiction.

SR Strong.
aasharon90 is online now