Originally Posted by
Blankspace87 
I was intruigued by someone's comment in my earlier thread which challenged "friends or drinking buddies"?. It's made me think, and wonder.
I do feel like there are some friends who contribute more to my drinking. Specifically, I have been having an affair for several years. I am starting to realise my drinking began to escalate at the time this affair started. The individual concerned is the individual I consume the most alcohol with. They are also the reason I drink to forget. I am very ashamed of my behaviour, and I'm starting to realise I need to quit BOTH, not just either/or. If you want to judge me, then fine. There is nothing hurtful you can say that I haven't already applied to myself.
Does anyone else have similar experiences or found their friendship groups significantly alter when they cut down or stopped drinking? How did you manage through this transition.
I was having an emotional affair with an older married man, also an alcoholic.. When my drinking ceased, and the haze cleared, the situation looked completely different to me, the absurd impropriety of it made me so disgusted that I couldn't physically tolerate being around him, it was making me sick.. And no longer being an active addict, his classic behavior really rubbed me the wrong way, cause I could now see so clearly what I had been!
When I did get sober, at first I didn't know how to relate to people, but gradually I have learned that I need female friends to confide in and have fun with. I used to think I got along with men better, but that was because we would drink and be intimate and then drift apart, that was easier, I thought.