I am sorry it was a fight last night. Yelling is really just not OK in my book unless you are yelling at someone to get their attention because something or someone is in danger.
I will share one thing. My mom Hated it when we (sister and I) would call out "Mom! Mom! Mom.....?" over and over again waiting for her to say "Yes, Seren" and then ask the question or say what we wanted to say. Annoyed her to bits and pieces, and she is not an alcoholic.
What she asked us to do was walk into the room where she happened to be and say: "Mom, may I have a snack?" or "Mom, may I go to Susie's house after school?" or whatever it was I was going to say. So that is what I learned and it is still how I address people.
Again, doubt my mother's personal annoyance at saying 'Mom' over and over has any bearing on what happened to you last night...but it might be a tiny small part of the equation.
I hope that peace has returned and the kids have calmed down! Sending many hugs and prayers your way.