Katchie...there will be no rewards in your crown for being a "nice guy".
LOL...I presume that you are a "nice guy" type, by nature.....and, that generally works pretty well with others who are also "nice guy" types. People who cooperate with us and who respect our general welfare as much as you respect theirs.....a nice interdependence that is equitable.....
But, sweetie....that ain't what you have got!!
You have a narcissistic, self centered alcoholic who seems to get off on making your life as miserable as he can.....
With a narcissist....there is no compassion and they have no qualms at using you to their advantage.
You cannot give them an inch...and, you can't let them see you sweat.
You have to think "self preservation", with them.....
As the saying goes..."Offer your hand, and they will take your arm".....
Resist false guilt...as it is probably some hold over of unresolved issues from your early years......