Found the needle...
welp.... I wrote in a few days ago suspecting my fiancé has relapsed. While I already knew, today I looked in his car and found a needle! There's no way it's old, I cleaned everything while he was in rehab ensuring not a thing was around. I searched every inch of the house and his vehicle with a fine tooth comb. Tonight his mother and I are confronting him! Any advice?? I'm dreading this.... three rehabs, three relapses! I mean my god atleast some people get a few months of clean time.... he's right back at it everytime within a few days at best a week. Can this really have that much of a hold on you? I'm not naive about addiction believe me I could write the book on it... but it's getting ridiculous already! His counselor said it best, "before rehab they have no choice, they will use, they know nothing else, they have no control" ..."after rehab, they are detoxed, they are sober, they have the tools they need" she said... using after rehab is a CHOICE not something they have no control over! It's infuriating to me to think after everything he would go back To this life ... I think it's a cop out and just shows that he LOVES the high! He doesn't care about me paying all the bills and working until my hands fall off just To buy milk. He's a veteran and has vivitrol for free, suboxone for free, counseling for free, he'll even rehab for free (which he's above, he has to go to the best top rehabs)!! I'm really fed up and feel so betrayed as usual and used once again! I feel like upon confronting him tonight I'm not going to come from a good place as advised, I feel like I'm going to end up flipping the table because that's how angry I am that all of our efforts have been for nothing..... I'm sure I'll calm down a bit by then but I won't be able to fall for the bullCrap another second! Pull it together or be gone!