Originally Posted by
Centered3 
"He" probably didn't. But his "disease"/ego probably told him there was no other option or way out. (Any Eckhart Tolle fans reading this will understand what I mean..."I can't live with myself anymore"--Eckhart Tolle, "The Power of Now", talking about when he was suicidal).
Good point. I Weill rembered the total despair that went with the unintended consequences of drinking. I have a vivid memory of landing face first in a cell, devastated that what was supposed to have been an evening of conviviality had ended in such a disastrous way yet again.
Getting in to trouble with the law was the furthest thing from my mind when I took the fatal first drink. The frustration and despair was brought on by a conscience that told me I was gravely in the wrong, and no matter how I tried, I couldn't do the right thing. It was becoming hopeless. I can completely understand how, being unable to see a way out, this man decided to end it all.
I had another friend, still alive as far as I know. He had five duis, blackouts, broken marriages, and none of it ever bothered him. He still drinks and drives, never thinks of the consequences. In his own words he doesn't care what happens. Quite a different outlook.
It could almost be said that Bill was a good man but sick, while my friend was a bad man, also sick.