Originally Posted by
MissPerfumado 
I don't know. Part of me is also scared that I am acting out addictive behaviour or avoiding intimacy, without admitting to myself that that's what is really going on, and that I am risking my sobriety pursuing this.
I think this is probably the biggest concern you should have, regardless of the nature of the relationship itself. Lots of folks have brought up many concerns about the potential relationship itself too.
You yourself have brought up many red flags of your own and it seems to me that honestly there are just too many possible things that could go wrong and jeapordize your sobriety.
I think the main thing I'd want to clear out front right away is to talk with the person this potential mate is already "attached" to - and find out if he or she is OK with it in the first place. If not, you and he could both be in for a very rude awakening.