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Old 11-12-2016, 09:48 AM
  # 25 (permalink)  
soberlicious
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: "I'm not lost for I know where I am. But however, where I am may be lost ..."
Posts: 5,273
I dunno...I felt a huge weight off my shoulders, both physically and emotionally, pretty much right away when I quit drinking. The momentum of that feeling of freedom carried over into other areas of my life, so that I was able to accomplish some things and grow in ways that I wasn't able to as a person addicted to alcohol. Quitting alcohol doesn't fix everything, but it makes it possible to eventually fix everything.

I also think that entitlement can lead to much struggle and unhappiness. The universe does not "owe" me anything, nor does anyone in it. I am not going to be pelted with kittens and rainbows just because I'm so amazing, and rainbows and kittens aren't the key to happiness anyway. When I stopped grasping for them, I suffered less. I also bristle a little at getting praise for quitting. I don't feel like I should get a medal for finally doing what I was supposed to be doing all along. I am responsible for my happiness...no one is going to give it to me.

For me happiness in life doesn't mean everything is good and the way I want it to be. Happiness for me means understanding that things will always be good and bad and up and down, and that I will be ok no matter what.

The pink cloud that comes from being free from addiction? I've had mine for almost 10 years now. The blackest times over the years will never be reason enough to go back to that hell. Even when life feels suffocating and threatens to do me in emotionally, I will always have the quiet comfort that despite everything, I am free.
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