Firsts
I sort of, kind of knew, somewhere in the back of my mind, that one day (if things kept going where they were going) i would see my alcoholic boyfriend be in a state of so drunk that he would lose control of his bladder or bowls. Either way. Totally a wake up call. And today was that day. He came home at 3am. I thought I was lucky that he was going to sleep straight away. And in a way I was. He said some druken nonsense that sounded like he was trying to start a fight, I just said OK.
Luckily he slid off the bed before pissing himself. At least the mattress is safe. Should I get a mattress cover? Sigh.
This whole, week, two weeks maybe, I've been feeling very "awake" to my scenario and what I want and how I feel. I just don't know what to say or do. And this is a line I draw. I can't. So I'm gonna find a AlAnon meeting and go. I was nervous and scared. But now I'm angry. And not the hot firey kind of anger. More like a slow steady march, with determination.
Wish me luck
Anyone else out there on the verge of going to first meeting?