bemyself... just noticed the quote in your sig, it's a great one.
Today while I was at work, I thought about emotional maturity... I can't post from there so I was just ruminating
I remember years back.. I was 21 and in a relationship but trying to meet new people. I went on a date with a great guy, an engineer from Austin, super smart and ecclectic.. UGH! Perfect!!!! I scared the living what have you out of him! I need stronger words than clingy and obsessive! (In subsequent years, I would scare other people even more) And what I remember is that we met on a Craigslist ad, before people stopped doing it because you could get killed, and then afterward when he tried the Craigslist route again, his new ad included with the list of qualities he was looking for in a girl: "A certain independence of mind is a requirement"
I had NO IDEA at the time what this meant. What I think it meant was emotional maturity, lack of a codependent streak, an identity of her own. It took me this long to acquire that myself.. Looking back, I find it remarkable a 24 year old male was looking for this! He found the one he was looking for, through that ad, and they married within a year. She is 6 years older than him.