Originally Posted by
anxiousandsad 
I broke down and had a drink last week after one "okay" day where I felt no panic whatsoever. Yeah and the next day it was all back. I don't know if this will ever end.did anyone feel this way?
And I just recently started going to therapy and was offered medication which I refuse to take in fear of getting hooked on anything else.
First let me say, It will end, it just takes time. I had a similar experience getting sober. At 10 months i am still experiencing some anxiety and depression, but NOTHING like it was in the beginning. My GP warned me about PAWS when I told her I had quit drinking; she gave all the potential symptoms and warned it could take up to 2 years to recover. She also suggested I take antidepressants to help. Well, I could not tolerate the AD's so i have been left to ride it out without meds. For some people the meds really are helpful but for others it's just another substance to become dependent upon. I think people get misled when the doctor says it's not addictive, when in reality the body and brain DO become dependent on any psychoactive medication, especially AD's and benzos. This means it can be equally as difficult withdrawing from the meds. Make sure, no matter what you choose, to do your research and consult with your doctor. I have found some great resources and support forums to help me through without the meds. Best wishes.