"Vertigo" in avrt
I am new to this site and new to avrt (11 days without drinking)
In the past the thing that always "got" me was that sudden attack of F- it just drink.
It always seemed to come "out of nowhere" and as if on automatic pilot, in a matter of minutes, I'd be on my way to get alcohol.
Trimpey names this sudden attack "vertigo" (just for the sake of giving it a name I suppose lol)
Yesterday, I had my first "attack" of this since stopping drinking. I recognized it as a Beast attack right away.
What amazed me though, was what I had thought of as being on automatic pilot and something that "just happened" actually had a lot of steps to it.
I was overcome with thoughts of "get a drink"
And I thought "No, I don't drink, It wants drink, but It can't drink unless I bring It the drink" Then I thought of the actual steps I would have to take to get It the drink.
1. Check how much money I had so I could decide what to buy
2. Get to the supermarket
3. Choose what to buy
4. Stand in a queue and pay for it
5. Get home and pour it
6. Lift the glass to my mouth and drink it.
It never "just happened" I the thinking, reasoning, me, had to make it happen.
Once I thought of this, the urge disappeared and thoughts of drinking disappeared