I have someone similar at work too. We've been friends a long time but I had confusing feelings for him that made me want to drink a lot and he drinks a lot too. I told him straight up that I quit. Last time I saw him he told me I was "boring" for not having an affair with him and I was also "boring" for not drinking any more. So be it.
I figured I'd been viewing him through rose colored glasses due to "daddy issues" just like you mentioned. A little sobriety revealed I'd been building him up a lot more than he deserved in my alcohol riddled little bird brain.
I hope now that you are moving on you won't feel so depressed over this guy. Caretakers for the elderly tend to be very special, sensitive people which might be why you are having these overwhelming feelings. I truly hope your decision brings you peace, and your continued sobriety brings you clarity. I'm glad you posted here today.