I've come to the conclusion that controlled drinking isn't possible for me either.
My main issue has always been with spirits (vodka/whiskey) or super strong cider (7.5% to 8%).
At one point I thought "I'll be fine if I just drink 'normal' lager and cider now and again", and technically that is true because if that was all I had ever drank then my problems wouldn't have got to the stage they did.
*But* I found that drinking 'normal' stuff just leads to the stronger stuff. Whether it's because it's not causing the right buzz, whether it's all psychological, I don't know, but I realised drinking any alcohol at all simply isn't a good idea for me.