Hi anonimuser
doesn't sound like you had a good night at all - it sounds terrifying and upsetting - but your addiction has you convinced 'it felt good to drink again'?
I had to accept that one of the costs of my drinking was often not knowing what I did last night.
Once I stopped drinking I stopped blacking out, and putting myself in danger.
I really believe we need to examine not only our drinking, but the stuff that happens when we do.
Accepting the whole of that reality made it easier for me to quit - and stay quit
D