So I had an epiphany.....
Today it just kind of hit me- I am getting stronger even though I tell myself I'm not strong - I can and do live on my own and I can support and take care of myself without Ah - I truly have done it for years! He really couldn't care any less about my well being- I need to care about myself and do what's best for me! He won't address a divorce - I will on my own! So looking forward to moving forward and seeing what's in store for me next just getting back to my old self! Thank you all so much for all of your help and for keeping me in line I know I'm a slow learner :-)