wantobehealthy.....I remember the frustration (and anger) when my ex coped out on seeing the children. You have all my sympathy with this.
Have you explained alcoholism to the girls? (I am assuming that the 8yr. old is the youngest), If you haven't, maybe it is time...?
Also, alateen might be another thing that wo uld help them. I have heard that alateen will take them as young as 8yr.s)....
I think it was good that you were able to "regroup" and continue with the day in a peaceful way. I am sure that it took some of the 'sharp edges" off...