I think it's accurate to say that he started making a move to become closer to me when I brought up in group that I didn't have any friends and that I didn't believe in god. I was very level and non-emotional about it, but I did perceive a subtle, yet perceptible wave of pity sweep the room. It was eye-opening but it made me feel like there was something wrong with me. Maybe my decisions aren't "normal" in a societal sense but I am comfortable with them. I just feel like there's something wrong about me feeling comfortable with them, but that's something for therapy.
One day our group therapist asked us to imagine what our spirits would say to us if they were standing outside our bodies. I was thinking, HUH?? Who's the freak here?? Lol! I didn't say that, of course. I did tell her that I have bipolar I disorder and that my mind couldn't afford to explore such distortions.
But my friend (J), never says anything at all about my lack of friends or spirituality at all. He's just there. His presence feels kind of protective and brotherly and it's very nice. I'll miss him so much.