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Old 08-26-2016, 10:19 PM
  # 118 (permalink)  
Yours Truly
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Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 94
Originally Posted by ring View Post
Hi YT, just popped on for a sec. this may answer question around triangulation.

Triangulation—the narcissist’s secret weapon



“Triangulation” can be defined as indirect communication where one person acts as messenger between two others, often times altering or fabricating the message to suit the tale bearer’s objective. Triangulation is a common tool of the narcissist and it goes hand in glove with “gaslighting”and “projection”

In the psychology of dysfunctional families, triangulation may take two forms: “[It] is most commonly used to express a situation in which one family member will not communicate directly with another family member, but will communicate with a third family member, forcing the third family member to then be part of the triangle.

“Triangulation can also be used as a label for a form of “splitting” in which one person plays the third family member against one that he or she is upset about. This is playing the two people against each other, but usually the person doing the splitting, will also engage in character assassination…”
I think I saw a very similar entry on Wikipedia! Thanks very much for digging that up and posting it though. It gets pretty complicated.

A lot of things started making sense to me after I started reading more about triangulation, Ring. When I replied to the "wig" email and thought I might have been giving him too much by saying she looked nice (and sincerely meant it), it was actually the opposite of what he was looking for. He was trying to provoke a jealous reaction. I wish I could find the original article now so I could elaborate more on that.

Even though I have always known what he was, it's kind of been like looking at a book and just reading the title. As I have opened the book and started reading more and more, I'm like, "Yes. . . .he does this and this and this and this and that too!!!!" He's a classic textbook example of a narcissist. When I was a teenager, a therapist once told me he was a flat-out sociopath. That stuck with me, but I didn't pursue it any further.

There was something you mentioned a couple of weeks ago about self-coupling. I googled "self coupling codependency" and "self coupling psychology" with no results. The closest thing I could find was along the lines of electrical transducers and quantum physics, and I'm no Lawrence Krauss. :-) Can you kindly explain this one to me? Thanks a bunch.
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