Welcome to SR.... We are glad you found us.
I dont have much advise on how to leave the situation but .....
I can suggest Al-anon, getting yourself some support so you dont feel so alone in all this. Its a crazy disease and the longer you try to work on it alone the crazier it will make you. The only person you can help is yourself, and in turn that will help your children.
We really do understand the feelings, and many more will come to post soon who might have more insight then I do.