Thread: Starting Over
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Old 08-14-2016, 08:44 AM
  # 48 (permalink)  
JustFine
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Join Date: Jul 2016
Posts: 76
The job.... Yes, I am very grateful! However, it made me think A LOT when I thought it was gone and my job should not BE my life. I work a government job and it is VERY demanding so..... BALANCE is going to be my new goal as to work.

Thanks Fini... I did read through and your post is quite insightful. I appreciate your help and support through this.

What has changed for me was when I finally decided to quit drinking after the last year of drinking again was I saw that the problem did not lie all in my drinking. It was in my attitude. Even sober I had become a materialistic, career driven, selfish b***h. I wanted more. More of everything. Drinking at first was quite difficult for me and for the first 6 months I was able to have one or two and leave it alone.... Of-course I was never not alcoholic. It just took a few months to return to being a binge drinking, self loathing alcoholic.... Lol!!!

When I woke up with my last hangover I had to ask myself what was really going on. I realized then I could not ever have the first drink and I could not continue to live the same way. I no longer liked myself. I no longer looked in the mirror and even knew who I was drunk or sober. For myself, personally the drink cannot be an option. I cannot allow my beast to take over for any amount of time and I must listen and recognize his voice vs my own however, not drinking is just the beginning. What about the rest?

RR never makes the claim to help with the rest....just the not drinking. The rest comes from somewhere within me. The journey began for me when I put down the drink. And the journey continues everyday. I like the support of this forum and I am glad we do not all think alike. I like hearing different points of view.

Shockozulu- I wish I could have read your post. If you ever have time feel free to rewrite it....
Jess
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