In an odd way, my toughest moments are when we have had people over for dinner and I am clearing the table, since my wife had cooked, and I used to not be able to pour out others peoples perfectly good wine that they left in their glass. I know, gross, and how sick and crazy, but that was what I would do, finish each and ever glass. For God's sake should there be a bottle left on the table with ANY wine left in it, that just did not occur to me to be rational. Yes, that was a small component of my drinking, it was bad, it was serious, and I was a blackout drinker when I finally knew that I either stopped then and there, or I would die. That was the morning that I stopped drinking at 11:00 am and went to AA. It was maybe one of the most important days of my life that I am very grateful for. Lot's and lot's of gratitude, trust me!!!