Liz...I have a simple, practical idea: Sometimes, we have to TELL other people what we want/need from them. With men...I think that sometimes, we might want them to be mind readers....but they really aren't.
I wonder that if you really let him know in what ways you like for him to be more spontaneous with his expressions of love....if he loves you, he would make an effort to try to make you happy, in that way.....
I think that, sometimes, couples have to "teach" each other. None of us come completely aware and "programed" to another person's needs.
It might even be possible that he never had the role m odel of a married couple
openly exchanging sweet intimacies, like that.....
dandylion