Sorry that your wife is such a disturbance and disappointment to you and your kids. We do manage to bring out the very worst in people who aren't sure if they thought very much of us in the first place.
She is very ill. Through the ages, the best efforts have failed with us. Not much you can do. I think if she might ---ENTIRELY on her own without prodding, take any curiosity about AA, well it is working for me and many others who have been quite disturbed ourselves. Once we come to realize there are folks who drank as helplessly as we did, and are free of it and solid, some of us eventually conclude to try their strange medicine. Has she ever been, or seen their book?
never know. Think if the mate brings it up our bristles fly and we get dead set against. But she'd be more than welcome to sneak into one of their meetings...they would LOVE the one about the liquor store on the flat tires...she has no right to keep one like that to herself...
i have no use for the huggy and prayey stuff either, but it is easy enough to evade that kinda crap.
She might even walk away and sign over her shares, never know.
dunno