Originally Posted by
Wells 
I just wish I knew a way to lovingly detach and for her to know that I want her to choose recovery, and not start this cycle over again.
She knows how you feel about her drinking, no matter how she spins it to you. And I don't know about lovingly detaching from an active alcoholic. It seems you did it peacefully. Be happy with that.
Alcohol is a whirlpool. It's sucking her in and your relationship with her is dragging you in too. Swim away.