Relapsing
4 days.
I lasted 4 days.
And I could give the excuse of issues in my private life but at the end of the day it was my choice. For the first time I'm realising how tough this is going to be, I enjoy the sensation of being drunk, I enjoy drinking. But I can see this is a problem that's progressively getting worse and worse. I feel I'm learning a lot about myself, I need to find peace with myself and to let go of all the anxiety and doubts and just be peaceful.
I've also realised I need to stop going through this on my own. Therefore I've decided to write a to do list publicly and I welcome any further advice.
1. I am going to visit my doctors and I'm going to try and ask for help. This is the one thing that feels me with terror, it's easy to type and say I have a problem but I've never really admitted it out loud, It literally makes me feel sick thinking about it.
2. I am going to try and attend a local AA meeting. I've been saying this for about 2 years but I'm determined to do it.
3. I am going to try and get a more balanced diet and focus on exercise to distract me from drinking.
4. I am going to try and post regularly on here to try and track my progress.
I welcome any advice from all you, thank you.