Originally Posted by
lggirl 
I did start the legal separation process but the lawyer is fighting for full custody also meaning I get to decide if I want drug testing and when he can visit. Visits would definitely be supervised. I'm trying to figure out more from a psychological stand point what's best for my daughter. He's been gone most of the past year and she only asks for him once in a while. Thanks for responding!
I go back and forth with that as well. My daughter is 3 and my son is 4 months. My daughter asks for him occasionally but doesn't seem to dwell on the idea of him for long. I would love for him to be present in their lives, but not if its going to be inconsistently and under the influence of anything, obviously. We are mama bears and of course only want the VERY best for our children. It's such a tough spot to be put in. I've read full custody can be hard to get so I'm preparing myself for joint. However, it won't be without drug testing. You said he's been gone for most of the past year, so maybe he won't even show up or fight for custody for that matter.