I would like to put this out there.
I don't like AH. There is nothing to like.
When we met 13 years ago, I was a different person. I was attracted then, I wouldn't be today. Today if I met him I would see an ill, sad, alcoholic. Back then I saw someone to rescue/save! To fill the emotional hole in me.
We can't split up right now so I keep living and learning about myself. Finding peace within me.