Update: 5 Years Later
Hi Everyone--
I used this forum a lot when I was dealing with my now XAW.
I am glad I got divorced. Really glad. Even though I was giving up a 15 year marriage and ton of money.
I am friends with XAW, I am friendly with her and see her about once every 2 months. I help her with certain aspects of her finances, but overall she is independent.
Unfortunately she has been unable to stay sober. The recurrent life-threatening situations and accidents have continued, and she has relapsed again and again, going back to the vodka bottle each time for another 6-12 month stretch ending in the hospital.
Most recently, she spent a long stretch in the hospital with liver issues, yellow skin, and yellow eyes. So she is sober now and I feel very sorry for her.
This is a 48 year old woman with liver failure. Her abdomen fills up with a liquid called ascites, continuously, and she has to be "tapped" 2 times per week. She is essentially a disabled person at this point.
I will always love her dearly and she is a sweet person. But I'm glad I got divorced. It was hard, but I don't think I could have done anything to change this dreadful situation and I am grateful for boundaries and the opportunity to live my own life.
Much love and blessings to all of you here, I don't visit often but I certainly do appreciate the community.