Hi wshall -- it sounds like you've had a lot of stress and change in the last couple of years. Learning to live sober, dealing with a separation and now a divorce, parenting ... it's a lot. I would think you'll need time to heal.
I had a divorce some years ago, and it took me a long time to feel at peace with it. It was a 15 year relationship and took about 5 years for me to feel that I had let it go. I still felt love for my ex, although I knew divorce was necessary and the right thing. It's just a big loss that takes time to process.
For me it was important to be very kind and gentle to myself. I did some work to understand my part in things, but also just tried to give myself permission to rest and heal.