Maz, hope you didn't buy any wine. To me it simply sounds like your addiction talking. The fact that you came here for help first tells me that part of you is ready to get sober. Listen to the reason in your own head and from everyone here and you can make the right choice. Your addiction only tells part of the story...it tells you some wine and a smoke would feel nice. It forgets to tell you about the anxiety, shame, hangovers and all the rest of the consequences.