Welcome Home, Rnewbie! Warning: venting is encouraged here at SR, and may result in caring encouragement from internet "strangers!"
And while I can't comment on female hormones (though I'm pretty sure I have more than I should), I can absolutely relate to messy surroundings; I'm Mr. Anti-Clean myself, and it can easily overwhelm me. Staying sober is helping a little, small steps are key for me. Best wishes for better days--Arp