It's a heartache. . .
Since January this year I have slowly but surely been going off the rails by binge drinking again. I fell for a guy who didn’t treat me so well and to cut a long story short, wanted just to be “friends” (with benefits) whereas I wanted something more.
It’s really affected me and consequently I have become depressed and have been binge drinking with friends to try and forget how I feel for a few hours. As a result of this of course I feel worse the next day, have been missing days of work and have found myself back on medication. (Effexor XR)
I am seeing a counselor for my depression this evening and I am now managing to stay away from alcohol during the week but. . . when it comes to the weekend, I feel so lonely with my thoughts that I go out with friends to the bar and drink until I forget. Sometimes this leads to me making a complete fool of myself and I want to hide for days.
This guy was not any good for me as he is alcohol and drug dependent, obnoxious and quite uncaring. . . I just wish I could get over being rejected by him and stop the pain.