Blackout -
I was just like you - paranoid about everything, especially substances with alcohol, like aftershave.
You have a healthy fear.
Even today, when I am using aftershave, I keep my lips shut tightly and I wash or dry may hands immediately.
I can't tell you when your drinking dreams will end or whether they will, but you always wake up and you're clean and sober.
Keep us posted with your progress and travails.
They're all part of sobriety.
For me, I have also relied on AA and God for help, and I haven't had a drink since I asked for help.
You don't have to have any relapses.