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Old 04-29-2016, 12:21 PM
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Introspectator
Introspectator
 
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Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: Michigan
Posts: 121
Alright, I'm scared now...

Sober since Nov 15. Decided to go to AA meetings 3-4 weeks ago...has been good. But...
Ya know, I was doing well without AA, but felt drawn to a meeting, and from there I just committed to more meetings. I have 2 sponsors. My Home group is A cross talk group...which is seeming pretty scary presently. My wife has recently voiced concerns about "losing her husband," mentally if not physically. We had a great talk a few nights ago. THAT hasn't happened in a long time. She brought up the concern about my tendencies, and my history, which were accurate. Mainly, the idea that I tried to drag my family with me into a cult not that many years ago. Yesterday something happened, I won't go into it, but it's something that I should tell my sponsor. What's scary is, the level of despair that I felt, and how "religiously" concerned I was about letting my sponsor down or letting the group down. It was a horrifying thought! And I could barely function. I am now, reading counter points to AA, and am concerned about my tendency to just plow ahead at 100 miles per hour with everything I do...I'm not even sure what to say here...I feel really unsure of everything g at this point...

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