Oh sweetie. I am just seeing this and my heart hurts for you. I know the anxiety this has to have caused you.
I second having his crap rolled to someone else for a while. He is an abuser. Everyone knows you are an excellent mom. All single moms are stressed. That does not mean that you are going to become all the negative things you are thinking about your mom.
We are here for you. Keep moving forward. I also agree that you did the right thing w/the taxes. The more you roll over, the more he thinks he can continue to abuse you mentally.
Tight, very tight, hugs to you.