Originally Posted by noinsanity2423

So, it's been almost a year since I left my XAGF, and I've had some issues come up this month. First of all, though, I'm almost a year without alcohol or cigarettes or drugs of any kind, and I'm almost a year out of codependent abusive relationships.

I had a long distance relationship going, but that ended a couple of weeks ago, poorly, as I felt like I was being ignored and she broke up over text message right after I had just paid money and visited her.

Anyway, I had all the HALT signs today, as I've been stressed out at work, lonely at the loss of my relationship, angry at a change in job situation, and just tired of working and going to school. However, I ignored them, and I thought I would check my ex's Facebook. Big mistake.

It turns out she got pregnant and had a kid last month. This was 11 months after I left her. Doing the math, at least it's not mine, but I went through all the emotions again today. Felt angry and betrayed...like...how could she go out and get herself pregnant only a couple of months after we had split!?!? She didn't even get married. The last I heard from her was July, so I anticipate she either found out then or already knew. Probably trying to Hoover me in to blame the pregnancy on me.

Anyway, I've been trying really hard to focus on the good here, but I really regret opening that can of worms. Everyone here tells me not to, and I drank the poison anyway. I guess I was just holding on to a shard of hope that she would get better, and I wanted so badly for her to prove me wrong. Instead, she has proven me right. Thanks for listening.

"I Left the Chaos," and "Anger Stage" for context.