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Old 03-24-2016, 04:51 PM
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oakleaf82
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Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 279
Hello. 40 Days Today

Hi everyone. I am back at this site after about 5 years hiatus. I became complacent and continued to drink during that time, knowing full well it was a problem, but not caring much or at least choosing to ignore it. I was not a daily drinker but a weekend binger. The roller coaster of binge, awful hangover, followed by a few days of guilt and anxiety, then feeling better just in time for the weekend to do it all over again. I don't know what exactly snapped me out of it but one weekend I just decided I did not want to do that. I don't drink at home really, always at a local bar. So that day I thought I'm not going to the bar this weekend. And I didn't and I've kept it up for 6 weeks now. What I have done different this time is reading a lot about alcoholism and specifically AVRT, which I am finding helpful. I have really avoided situations and people that I know will be triggers. I have the full support of my significant other, which is helping so much because in the past we were never quite on board with quitting at the same time. Drinking had really become our hobby that we shared together. I also think that perhaps I am just more mature now and ready to quit and not care what other people think about it. My next step is to start telling people close to me. I've been hesitant for a few reasons: if I drink again I'll feel stupid. At least if I haven't told people I'll be the only one that knows I failed (hesitated even posting here for that reason haha), I'm a private person and I don't want people knowing I have or had a problem or prying into my reasons. I realize I don't owe anyone an explanation but I do think if people know it will be easier for me stay sober. People know me as a drinker. Lastly I suppose if I don't tell people then I'm leaving the option open to easily drink again. So I need to start building my social life up again in a way that doesn't revolve around the bar and drinking friends. I can only avoid the world for so long. I have also been reading here a lot, just not posting

That said, I have been enjoying hangover free weekends, getting up early and working out on Saturdays instead of lying in bed in misery. I've always enjoyed excercising and am doing so much more regularly. And saving a lot of money it is truly astounding!

So that's my intro. The longest stretch I have had sober was 18 days last time I tried, and here I am at 40 days
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